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My boys are really starting to get to know me too well. Pump me full of enough alcohol and I will do just about anything that you suggest out of me. You may think that I am lying but I am telling the truth, scouts honor. I was drinking a bunch of tequila at a party and started to strip onto the counters. The guys were throwing dollar bills at me and I was shoving them into anything that I could. Including my cunt. That is when Eddie suggested I started making some real money. That meant that I needed to take my phone sex line ass to the corner and start to have some live phone sex with some Johns. That is what I did too. My drunk ass worked my way down to the corner where I waited for John after John sucking cocks for 15$. The guys thought it was a really great deal for them too. They thought they would act like my pimps for the night taking all the profits. Ass holes should know by now that I am the one who wants all the money.
Man did I get shit faced the other night. I am seriously the drunkest live phone sex slut around. I do not really remember anything from that nigh except I woke up naked and that I had shit in my teeth. I am not meaning like some sort of food either. I am talking about literal shit, like dooks, up in my grill. It took me a while to piece together the majority of the evening, I must had blacked out which was nothing new. I remember it was only me and one other of my buddies drinking. We were drinking a ton of tequila and some streak and shake chili.
That was a bad combination, because the more shit faced I got the horneier I was. So while I was turning into a horn ball this dudes stomach was working up a mad big shit. I straddled him on the couch and was making out with him. He pulled my shirt over my head and sucked on my nipples while I dry humped him. I was grinding back and forth on him while he grew harder and harder in his pants. Then the chili hit him and he shoved me off darting to the bathroom.
I quickly ran behind him. I wanted nothing but his cock in my mouth and I could care less if the smell of shit was coating my taste buds already. He pulled his cock from the toilet and stroked it while he shit a little more. I came and knelt between his legs gagging at the stink of shit invading my nostrils. He shoved my head onto his cock forcing me to give him a blumpkin. I groaned and gaged as he face fucked me, when he came into my mouth he at the same time shit what sounded and smelled like everything he ate for the last week into the shitter. It smelled awful. Past that I do not remember but I have a feeling a dirty rim job was involved.
Nothin Better then a good whore
Be sure she will such your cock just to get a score
Fuck her in her ass she will beg for more
And with her it’s a fuck that’s never a bore.
Go head babe come get this Slut
She will give you what you want and you aint gotta say what
She really loves it when you fuck her in the butt
This bitch never keep her legs shut
Live phone sex gots you a perfect sloot
Don’t worry bout her pimp you pay he won’t shoot
Gost lots f money you’ll never get the boot
Shove your cock in her throat just as good as mute
Nothin better then a hot blonde tramp
Pull up in dat pussy n’ you can make camp
Dat shit so loose you could roll up in dat wit no ramp
Bitch takes anything like a champ
Live phone sex will get you dat hooker
Can’t promise you though she’ll be no looker
Bitch’ll be used by the neighborhood cooker
But she will please day dick cause she ain’t no rooker
A neighbor of mine was throwing this box in the dumpster. He daughter was running behind her crying, beggin her not to. She just kept tellin her to shut up and that she was not rassin no harlot or whatever. Grabbed that little brat by her ear and drug her back up the driveway. After they went in I went to their curb and looked in the trash. Wasn’t sure what I would find but it was public property now. I was bright colored box with the words “play doh” wrote on the side. I took it to the house and pulled out the contents. There was some play doh in there that is for sure but there was also this toy that resembled a dick! I was sure as fuck surprised, and then I was turned on. I stuffed it with some green play doh and then squirt it out the top and laughed. It looked like it was squirting out some alien jizz from the top. I cleaned it out and laid back on the table and started to play with my clit with it. I got myself nice and wet and then started to shove it into my pussy. It felt so good. No wonder that bitch threw it out, she prolly caught her daughter doing the nasty with it. I know I would had been at her age no doubt about that. I continued to moan and whimper and then my favorite four legged friend came up and started to rim job me with his wide tongue. Fuck it felt amazing, who knew play doh could be responsible for this much pleasure. I came all over it and my fur friends face too. Once I removed my new found pussy play toy I took a swig of jack and let him finish licking me clean. Good boy, and good play doh. HaHa
Fuck! I forgot to pay my trash bill, again. It ain’t like I don’t got the money I just keep forgettin to pay it. So I tried to chase down the trash guys but they wanted to act like there was nothing that they could do to help me. I would not accept that for an answer, not even if it was from some fine ass dude who has muscles like the hulk. I bagged up my trash and headed down to the City dump. They said I could pay the bill there. By the time I got there though the office was closed and the men on my route were getting things on their end gathered up. I asked them if I could just throw my shit in and they said no. I knew no was easily changed to yes, especially if you have nice ass titties like I do.
I lifted up my shirt and flashed them my nipples. They all clapped their hands and the main dude said it was not a deal. He started to whip out his cock and told me that I would have to do much better then flashing some boobies that they could go home to their girl friends and wives and see. I squatted down in the trash and took his cock into my mouth and it tasted yummy. They all joined in and decided that it was sexy as fuck to be fuckin at the trash dump. It was whatever to me; I just wanted to dump my trash. They all had some nice meaty cocks though. I rode them each and edged them all close to cumming. They held out their dicks and coated me with their seed. They were however sweet enough to take my trash outta my car. Which reminds me, I need to get my bill paid.
Aint nothing better than some drugs and a cock cept drugs and black girl phone sex. Alyssa is not usually with my dealer but she owes this dude mad money for all of the crack she keeps smoking up so he has been makin her his bitch. I might be a white trash slut but I ain’t into crack like that hoe is. My dude bring me pot though and plenty of thizzles if I need them, which I am not really messing with tonight. Anyway, so he came over t\with her in tow and I was already pretty hammered. He has been after my pussy for a minute, but he ain’t my type. Which is kinda funny cause I do not really gotta type. So he said he would give me the quarter for free if he could nut on me an Alyssa fuckin in front of him.
We both stared at each other. Alyssa could be a bit of a trip sometimes, but she had that chocolate pussy that I ain’t tasted in quite some time. We decided it was cool if I would let us smoke a blunt with him first, and then we had at it. I licked her pussy like it was a chocolate bar melting in the summer. She moaned and shoved my face into her. We licked each other till we were soakin wet and then I took out a giant double sided dildo. I shoved it in my ass and she stuck the other in hers. We both were on all fours backin out asses up into each other, taking that rubber dick deep into out assholes. Dude made his cum rain all over our backs and then we finished 69ing in the others mouths. Best sex for weed I have ever had.
It is no secret that I am a fish when it comes to my alcohol and how I take it down. In fact if you wanted to dump me into a fish tank with a whole lotta tequila and beer I am sure my lungs would easily adapt. I got shit faced at my own house with a group of guys, nothing new there, but this new cat thought I had passed out like a little bitch and wanted to make a amateur drunk sex porn. I could hear them talking about me like I was not there. I was just resting my eyes for real though but also getting super turned on about the thought of them attempting to fill out their drunk rape fantasies on me. Hey, I was willing to take some cock in my ass while pretending to be passed out to help out a mother fucker. That is exactly what I did too.
I laid on my couch pretended like I was asleep, kinda doing that gurgly argh think like I had seen so many light weight cunts do. They filmed on their phones like total newbiews. It was whatever though I was not making money off of it so I was not giving the dumb asses any tips. One recorded while the others watched the one guy reached up my skirt and began to play with my pussy. It was hard not to moan, he actually had some skilled fingers. Once he was comfortable the other guys joined in and tag teamed my cunt. They fucked me in every hole that I had available. I could not hold it any more, I whimpered and moaned for more and more. They used me as their drunk fucking disposal too. Creampied my pussy and used my mouth as their cum dumpster.
I hang out in bars, a lot, so I is no surprise that I wound up meeting a guy who wanted me to be his leading gal. Not only that but he was in a grade A official biker gang. I thought that was so hot. I loved the thought of riding a big ol bike between my legs, and being some guys fuck toy. He came by the bar a few times and then told me he was going to take me to their bar. Not a problem, all the guy and their ride or dies were cool as fuck. They said I could have a try out and that I needed to be back at the bar that Saturday. They also said not to eat anything 12 hours prior which I thought was weird at the time but whatever. I wanted the fucking thrill of steel!
When I showed up there were a ton of bikes outside of the bar. I giggled knowing the bar was full, and I was about to get a bike club gangbang to tear me up. Most bitches would just walk away, but not this blonde fucking cum dumpster. When I got in there they started to force feed me shot after shot. Then they though me over the bar and rammed the bottle down my throat and I chugged it down. I was going to be doing some serious drunk fucking, and it did not take long for it to go to my head. I stumbled off of the bar and was thrown over the pool table.
My clothing was torn off my body like a fuck doll and I giggled. Someone did not like that very much because I had a big cock shoved into my throat. The group of 10 guys fucked me while their sluts held me down. Idk what the need for the holding was, I guess I should had made it more clear I was a cum dumpster for their disposal needs. They all plowed me like the dirty white trash bitch I was. I had three guys in my used up asshole at one time and I loved every second of it. When they came all over me, and invited me into the gang. I walked away though, telling them organized sports were never really my thang. I loved being a cum dumpster though, so call me for any of their party needs. I blew a kiss and walked away, drunk as fuck and smelling like sweaty ass and cum.